Tuesday, January 13, 2015

Truthful Tuesday - Another Running Injury

This is certainly a post I never wanted to have to write again

As a runner, I know I'm prone to injuries. I've had a bout with IT Band problems when I first started running. I've dealt with plantar fasciitis not once, but twice even going so far as to tear the one on my left foot during a half marathon. I've lived with piriformis pain for years now, and recently a weird pain in my heel that I thought might just be another manifestation of plantar fasciitis perhaps. Hint: it's not. 

I am definitely going through the stages of mourning right now. I'm currently in the wallowing in self-pity phase. Jason has suggested, hinted that he may need to move out for 6 weeks. Joking/sort of. The one thing that I use to de-stress, to help deal with depression, to stay centered is being pulled away from me again. 

Two words every runner dreads: Stress Fracture

I tend to be an honest person to a fault. So here it goes ... The Truth Is ...

The Truth Is
I have Achilles tendinitis in my right foot. I've been pushing through and "dealing" with it since roughly October. I have taken naproxen, iced, rolled out calves and tried to strengthen feet and calves. It's gotten better, but it's very angry. I avoid certain shoes even. 

The Truth Is
I have a possible stress fracture of the 3rd and 5th metatarsals. Go big or go home right? Of course the x-rays didn't show a full fracture (that's good I think) but he showed me how the bones were distorted (that's not good). He saw that antsy, twitchy wild animal stare. I had 3 choices: 1) go home in a boot and don't do anything for 6 weeks, 2) go home and don't do anything for 10 days, it cooouuullldddd possibly (mostly likely not) be an overuse injury, test it after 10 days, if there is pain immediately sorry you're out 4+ more weeks of rest, 3) get MRI and know for sure that it's a fracture and you're still out 6 weeks. 

The Truth Is
I choice option 2, which he said he knew I would. Though, I think I should have gotten the boot and scheduled an MRI.

The Truth Is
It hurts to walk. Period. Go back to the above truth where I should have gotten the boot. 

The Truth Is
I never told anyone the top part of my foot was hurting. It was a very gradual onset, as is typical of stress fractures. Compared to my Achillies issue, it felt like a non-issue. It finally started to become a big issue this past week though. And of course, I ignored it until I couldn't.

The Truth Is
After my run on Thursday afternoon, I knew I was done. It hurt with every step, every step even after the run. I called the doctor as soon as they opened on Friday. 

The Truth Is
I'm pissed. I'm so angry. I feel cheated, maybe more so this time because of coming off of a major marathon high. I have had an amazing running year with PRs and accomplishing my first marathon. So I feel very crushed, defeated, stomped on. Mad.

The Truth Is
I know it could be far worse of course. I've had injuries and come back from them and so have thousands of other runners. And then there are those runners who've had injuries you can't come back from. I'm lucky. I know this. 

The Truth Is
I cried all day on Saturday, wallowing in utter self-pity. I got really upset when I saw pictures and posts of everyone else getting in their long runs. I was envious. 

The Truth Is
I don't want anyone else to tell me to swim, aqua jog, take up yoga. I completely appreciate the advice, suggestions, heart-felt sentiments (and this is where being too honest bites me sometimes because I offend people). I don't want to swim. The thought of swimming in an indoor pool makes me want to throw things. Like breakable things. And yoga? Yeah, well, I've tried and tried and tried. I don't know what it is, but I just can't get into it. And honestly, there would be many poses that I couldn't do because of my foot. 

The Truth Is
I know that this will pass. I know it's just a blip in the road. I know. I know. I know I know. But it doesn't make it any easier.